Section 2 Complete
Archive Begin Transmission
Trapped in a big crystal, faced with a squad of aliens ready to murder me after tricking me back in time. I’d expected them to go for the kill immediately, but they had some idea of due process. Maybe they wanted to take their time. Either way, they didn’t care to talk to me, the victim of their “complete victory” as he’d so arrogantly put it. I know what Sun Tzu said, but I don’t like declaring victory before people are dead.
These alien fuckers from Omicron Persei 8 relaxed. One of them, uniform colored primarily teal, stepped over to the diamond-shaped floating timeship and pressed a hand to it. He, or whatever that species has, pressed a hand to it and disappeared. That left three. Red watched me. The brown one circled around me. Purple stared off after Venus. That part was something I had to handle later, because I knew if I focused on her, I’d get locked in a loop.
I strained to breathe in that crystal. Not entirely sure how I was able to do so, in fact, but I was focused more on surviving than exploring mysterious technology. Luckily, I knew how to send my mind outside my body. Forget meditation, I’d dropped off those drones earlier. They must have been mistaken for another part of the ambush by she-who-must-be-impaled-later. Ok, so I’d brought a couple. The laser drone could be handy for getting me loose from this thing, but I don’t see these bozos letting it finish the job. I’d packed the other one with automatic ballistic weaponry. I know, a bit of boring gunplay. Hindsight’s a bitch and it’s too late to strap a rocket launcher or some grenades to the thing.
Rounds from the gun drone loosened dirt around the base of my prison. Red took cover. The triangular remote-control weapons platforms moved in quickly, zooming to press against it. The one with the gun attached took the best position and aimed away so it could fire and let recoil add to the force. They were so… damn… close. And then it moved a tiny bit. And a little more. The purple guy walked right up to where the drones were trying to help me gather some speed. Good thing for the 360 view of my armor the way I rolled out of view.
The laser drone was essential, but the gun drone I could risk. The laser one flew up while the purple people trapper walked over, caught just as it backed up to ram the orb again. He grabbed it and said something in weird sounds I couldn’t translate. Probably something smug about me being some primitive lifeform. It’s like they’re confusing me for a damn human. Not the first time I’ve had people coming after devices I built. I’ve learned lessons. I installed explosives. The drone self-destructed in that guy’s hands. So he didn’t have hands anymore.
More than that, the explosion gave a little more force to the orb I was encased in. I rolled toward the brown guy, though. He had one job. One job. But he didn’t get a good grip on the cracking material and I bounced off, rolling. And rolling. And rolling even more. We must have been on a slight slope. It was hard to tell at that point. I couldn’t even fly the remaining drone at that point. I had to set it to hover while my internal music player started playing “Round and Round” for some reason. I didn’t have time to manage my music selection. I was trying not to throw up while trapped in a rock.
When I did finally stop, I’d splashed into the marsh. Because that’s cool. Let’s add a moat to my situation. And it’s the Cretaceous period, so there are probably dog-sized leeches around, just waiting to get Medieval medicine on my ass. My stomach was spinning, but I could at least call the drone to me without making it do loop de loops. The drone caught a glimpse of the leader tending to the guy whose hands I blew off. The one in brown ran after me while they were busy. Seeing him close in, I brought up the drone to go ahead and start taking a little off the edges. I worked on cutting an arm free by cutting down parallel to my head and neck.
The beam cut slowly. Worse, the drone had to stop firing to cool down. I wasn’t going to be able to get this guy before he started splashing into the water, crawling over roots and stepping around this giant log. On the plus side, I doubted the bastard could roll me anywhere, especially out of that muck. If I was lucky, they’d have trouble loading me into their ship. Can a guy catch a break?
Suddenly, the thirty foot log nearby raised its head out of the water and lunged for Brown, completely justifying the color of his pants. This giant fucking gator attacked like a gumbo chef’s worst nightmare, hissing. Ever hear a thirty foot long alligator hiss? It’s not cute.
Now, I don’t know for a fact that Brown used his pants as nature clearly intended. When he turned to catch that thing’s jaw and stop it from swallowing him whole, he looked wet like a guy naturally would after tromping through a swamp. He diverted its maw to the side, and I felt fairly safe inside my crystalline prison. Hell, I figured this thing was going to solve all my problems for me. Then our not-so-favorite Martian pulled laser swords out of Uranus. Glowing, thin blades of light grew from the palms of his gloves. The blades shown like the edge of a pane of glass. Alien and prehistoric reptilian predator met in a clash of lasers and primal fury.
Would have been awesome to see, but I was carving myself an arm free with the laser. And as soon as that thing was able to move a bit, the enhanced strength of my power armor allowed me to break it fully loose and start taking off more chunks, especially when I used my energy gauntlets. The good news is that it wasn’t really sticking to me in any way. Once I got enough of myself clear, the material from the orb would just fall off. One arm soon turned into two arms, then all four, my head and torso, then I was able to pull my legs out of there. I had to set the radiationthrower down in the orb’s remains as I freed myself, though.
That was about the time that gatorzilla released a last, gurgling hiss, twitching. Brown jumped off, uniform torn along his torso in the shape of jagged fang marks. Neither of us really had a moment to celebrate, as he swung one light sword at my midsection. I jumped over it easily thanks to my suit’s enhancements, but then he swung the other arm up in a bisecting uppercut. Probably would have gotten me if not for the elbow rockets on my armor. They allowed me to shoot forward just enough to stomp on his head before landing behind him. We turned at the same time, me right up in his face. With my four arms, I had his two by the elbow and wrist.
He headbutted me. I headbutted him back. He kneed me in the groin. I have a pussy. Unfortunately for him, I also had a laser drone that flew down and carved through his neck like thermite through a piggybank. Remember, kids: the word “overkill” still has kill in it. Now, just in case he had some sort of strange alien physiology that would let him stab me after losing his head, I held onto his body through its death shakes, singing to myself. “Just like me, they long to be, close to you…”
After he stopped shaking, I dropped him and got the fuck out of that water before it turns out the land I was standing on was an even bigger gator. For fuck’s sake, no wonder somebody threw a meteor at this place with those things swimming around.
Free from the swamp, and the muck, I was able to project invisibility, which likely wouldn’t do any good. It didn’t stop them form seeing me when I raided their homeworld. The red… ranger?… came over a rise on his way down, all by his lonesome. Oh, wait, that’s right, they can see through my invisibility. That’s why he didn’t have any trouble spotting me. He pressed his palms together and came away with a shorter pair of blades. Where before it was like a longsword, this pair were dagger-length.
“Wait!” I said, holding up my hands. He didn’t, so he was actually pretty close when I backflipped onto the remains of my crystal prison and kicked the main gun of the radiationthrower into my arms. I kicked that bad boy into full release and started nuking him from orbit. It was hard to be sure though, as he’d made it into the water. The radiation put up a fog as it began microwaving the water around the alien. The hissing of the steam made me glance over and make sure the big gator wasn’t moving. When I turned my attention back to Red, he’d stepped out of the fog and wasn’t looking that good.
Brown armor plates deformed and twisted off underneath the remnants of his uniform. He didn’t even have one of his gloves and its laser dagger anymore, but he kept on coming. I saw the bottom portion of his helmet deforming, crinkling, melting. He stabbed at the radiationthrower’s backpack line. I jumped as he severed it, leaving him standing there with a hose leading right to a nuclear core expelling heat all around it.
He dove to get away, splashing into the murk. When he came up, I smacked him on his weakened helmet with the gun portion again, then brought it down on his hand to keep him from directing his little stabber at me. I wanted to just bash his head in or hold him under the water until he drowned, if he can drown, but that’s too slow of a victory when the opponent has time travel on their side. Instead, I unhooked a rubber chicken grenade and pulled the red guy up. I tore the grenade’s head off and stuck it under his belt before tossing him onto the wild and loose nuclear reactor. Whatever weird trills made up his language, they rose in pitch and felt like they were stabbing into my ears until the grenade detonated. It didn’t necessarily destroy all the fissionable material involved, but it hopefully didn’t do anything too bad to the timeline.
Off in the distance, I saw Mobian’s timeship, the one I’d arrived on, rise up into the sky and blink out of existence, thoroughly stranding me. So I took care of some of these fuckers, but I’m not out of the prehistoric marsh yet.
When the diamond-shaped brick shithouse of a ship floated over minutes later, I lay unmoving on the shore. It hovered closer, then a flash brought forth the teal colored one. He walked over and nudged me with a boot. Then he kicked me. He kept going, harder, and I began to wonder if he might know I’m alive. He almost hit my remaining drone where it was hidden under my cape. I was just about to jump up and take him out when he turned toward his compatriots.
I couldn’t see the expression on his face, of course, but I’m sure it turned to surprise when one of my arms burst through his chest, tossing away a portion of what might have been a spine. Purple blood sprayed everywhere, and he soon found he couldn’t control his own arms, what with my lower arms holding them. I dragged him close to the ship then. Intertwined, I reached out with his hand. Suddenly, the ship expanded, growing larger all around us as a beam of light pulled us into it. So glad it’s not one of those deathtrap teleporters that’d kill me and make a copy on the other end.
When it finally released us, I pulled myself out of the dead body I brought with me, holding it ready to smack opposition with. Instead, I found nothing except a relatively small room. It seemed empty, except there had been one with an uncomfirmed fate. Purple, whose hands I blew off. I scoured the place, finding a pretty well-rounded ship. Group quarters, mess hall, storage, some sort of control center, and finally the medical station. The doctor’s office itself, complete with a serious of rounded pods, all clear except for one. I walked over, looking for any sort of control. I found a panel that lit up with different symbols in different places, but nothing I could use. It was when I tried tapping on the pod itself that the thing cleared out in a small radius around where I’d touched. The thing had felt more like water than anything solid. More importantly, I saw our Purple friend inside, stumps looking slightly longer than I thought I’d left him.
Remembering the way it felt, I pushed my hand against the surface harder and found it gave to my touch. They must have put him out, too. He didn’t resist at all when my hand snaked up to his throat. Oh, sure, choking him, then he tried to fight back. For obvious reasons, he couldn’t get a grip. I ended up pulling him out of that pod and holding him up in the air. One hand choked, the other three kept him from kicking me away. Finally, he fought back no more. I snapped his neck for good measure and squeezed it until it separated from his head, then tossed him aside.
With a moment to think things through, I made my way to the command center, going over stuff. Betrayed by Venus. No, Future Venus. My Venus hasn’t done this, but now I know she’s capable of it. Hell, she still might. So Future Venus left me to my fate with these aliens. Mobian’s ship disappeared. And the fuckers who had used me as just a commodity to hand over had my daughter. Future Venus and Mobian. Not exactly the easiest nut to crack.
But as I pulled my gauntlets off and pressed my hands to a control panel, I smiled. I couldn’t understand the programming language and had been a bit surprised that my body even managed to bond to this ship’s computer at all, but it had worked. All I had to do now was decipher this language. Then, I’ll have all the time in the world to bring them 1.21 jiggawatts of pain.
Archive Transmission Fragment 2 Complete
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